A Spiritually Exhausting Week

Dear Calder, Wow...has your week been spiritually exhausting too? I am so excited to hear all about the changes and your new responsibilities. As I gathered pictures for the weekly email, I came across McKay's birthday and it feels like a month since McKay's birthday! Last Sunday after everyone finally went to bed and I sent your letter, I stayed up super late thinking through counselors and advisors for my new young women's calling as president. I don't know if you know this, but I've never been a president before. It was actually a really cool experience. My head was just spinning all night and finally I went to bed. Monday morning I woke up and continued pondering, rearranging and thinking about the names that kept coming back around. Lori Paulsen came over later that morning and we visited for like three hours as we talked over names, needs of the girls and moving forward. After Lori left, I felt my head spinning even more and I was just anxious. I started reworking names and just felt confused until I had the chance to talk to Dad later that night. Dad is really a calming force in my life. He's just so wise and after I talked with him, I put the names back together with some slight tweaks and went to bed. Tuesday was a gift to me. It was fairly quiet in my head and I was able to concentrate on McKay and celebrate him. I texted with the Bishop and he gave me a little more information but felt really good about the names I had submitted. He asked me to think about some of the names a little more, which I did but I came back to him on Wednesday feeling really set. So, we began to move forward. On Thursday I went to an amazing training meeting and had to catch a ride home with Lori because Dad got called into a meeting with President Lee. Lori drilled me about the names I submitted and then she did something that I felt was really weird. She totally pushed back on the names I had submitted and literally gave me a new list to consider. It was kind of buggy but in the long run I think it was good because it made me think again; however, this time I was certain that the names I submitted were inspired and I can totally have that as an anchor. My mind has been settled and my heart has been calm. What more can I ask for? I had the chance to go to the temple on Friday and it was so wonderful. I didn't get to go with Dad because he went to do baptisms with McKay and Gieg Riser on Thursday. On Friday I was only able to get into sealings, and I really like doing that ordinance with Dad. But it was such a spiritual time to be in the temple. Tears just ran down my face. I've never been so glad to be wearing a mask. The mask hides a lot of tears. I was just so overwhelmed with the feeling of love and gratitude. Have I ever told you how much I love the temple???? Saturday was super busy. We were busy getting ready for our thanksgiving guests. Tara is coming with the kids (Greg has to work) to stay with us and we are hosting the first ever Horsley thanksgiving! 22 people. I am really excited. But I seriously have so much to do between now and when they arrive on Wednesday afternoon. It will be wonderful to be together. Cecily mentioned the possibility to connect all of us together on Thanksgiving Day at noon our time, 9pm your time and 8pm Will's time. We will have to talk over that tonight when you call and make sure you feel okay about this call. My Sunday was very strange. I just felt so vulnerable as I walked into church. I didn't know who had been called and what they would say. I felt worried because I didn't feel good about calling Kit back into the presidency and I knew her heart would be broken. When the meeting started the opening song was "How Firm A Foundation" and that's one of my favorites. The third verse, "fear not I am with thee" was exactly what I needed. Not to mention it was my mission scripture - Isaiah 41:10. And it kept going from there. Each hymn was literally hand picked for my good today. Music plays such a huge role in my life and I felt like the Lord was putting His arms around me as we sang today. It was awesome. You may be wondering what names I submitted....I'm wondering how many of the women you know. My first counselor is Stacie Aho, 2nd counselor is Natalie Montegue, Secretary is Reachel Bagley, and the three advisors are Andrea Christense, Shauna Olsen and Maria Staker. Well, all I can say is it's been a spiritually exhausting week. It's always good to know the Lord is very aware of you and I definitely felt that this week. I hope you are feeling the same thing in this transition. I'm thinking so much about you. You are on the prayer rolls of the Draper temple (probably a couple of times) and we are praying for you and those you are teaching. Hang in there and continue to press forward, working diligently and being obedient and it will come together. I love and miss you but above all else, I am especially THANKFUL for you and for your mission. Make it a great week. Can't wait to talk to you! Love you tons! Mom